Sunday, July 18, 2010

Magpie 23-Rescued

I thought the circumstance dire
as my nostrils flooded with smoke.
I became cautious as I sensed the fire.

Could it have been a rotten wire
that may have cracked or broke?
He came and to his arms I did retire.

My breathing began to tire
as I began to gasp and choke
I became cautious as I sensed the fire.

The air was getting drier
and my lungs began to revolt,
He came and to his arms I did retire.

The feeling of safety had been a liar
And I wished this was just a joke.
I became cautious as I sensed the fire.

As time began to expire,
My hero threw me a rope
I became cautious as I sensed the fire
He came and to his arms I did retire.



This was written for Magpie Tales.  Click the link to read some terrific writers or to post something of your own.

14 comments:

  1. caty, i promise to get back here soon and read your magpie but first i have to tell you that i've nominated you to receive a wonderful award, only there are strings attached. i understand if you don't want to mess with it...but will we still be friends????

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  2. love the repitition...its rather enchanting...this could be read a few ways too...very literally a scary situation, to be in a fire....my grandfather was a fireman...and then it could be read metaphorically...either way, good thing your hero found you...smiles.

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  3. I like the rhytm and the repetition very much. A great Magpie!

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  4. I thought it might have been a song as I was reading it. It's a great poem too though! I have felt like this quite often.

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  5. Intriguing, Caty. Good Magpie.

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  6. I, too, liked the rhythm and repetition! Nice post!

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  7. Love the repetition and rhymes...taut and tense poem

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  8. beautiful with the right touch of mystery!

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  9. I love the style of this poem. The flow of it is fantastic and I love the rhythm.

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  10. Thanks for the nice comments everyone :)

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  11. Couldn't help noticing your Little People pics :)
    You write in villanelle form very well. Thanks

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  12. "He came and to his arms I did retire." very instantaneous. i loved the repartition and the kind of magnetic flow of this poem.

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Your thoughts are welcome here :)