Monday, May 31, 2010

Magpie 16...the soldier's shoes

Sitting alone on the floor of their closet,
he cradled the shoes she wore the very first time they danced.
He remembered the scent of her perfume, the loose style of her long brown hair.
The way she looked at him and smiled, as if he was the only other existence.

Memories of their wedding shaped in his mind.
The way she looked walking down the aisle
in her pearl white flowing dress
beads strewn throughout her hair.
Their vows said and I do's pronounced.

He also remembered the day she left
He remembered kissing her goodbye
And telling her to return safely
He watched her board the bus that would take her away
...and never bring her back.

The knock at the door clear in his mind.
His worst nightmare come true.
The soldiers told him the tragic news
His wife had become a victim of war.
His wife gave her life for his freedom.

He held the shoes tightly to his chest
as he sat there alone on the closet floor.
Memories flowing through his mind.
Tears flowing from his face.

**This was a magpie tale.  Check out Magpie tales from "Challenges I love" to read some great stuff!  Hope everyone has a great Memorial Day.  Thank you to all the men and women who have given their service and their lives for our freedom and who continue to serve and protect our freedom every day!

Sunday, May 30, 2010

Sunday 160...I'm heading to the nascar race today!

A colorful crowd
the scenery a blur of color and noise
the speeds conquering well over 100
engines roaring, wall hugging
a sudden blown tire
isn't it "the pits"

**this is a sunday 160. How much can you say in 160 characters.  To learn more or take the challenge, visit Monkey Man from "Challenges I love"

Friday, May 28, 2010

Is life normal on Mars?

Sometimes people confuse me.  Why they do such things. Today I had the pleasure of meeting a beautiful blonde 2 year old little boy.  He is the victim of a hit and run drunk driver.  The history of the driver is horrible.  A 45 year old man with 2 pending DUI's in the last 6 months and he hasn't had a license in 12 years.  Yet, he is allowed to continue to stalk the streets in a murderous vehicle and in a complete drunken stupor.  Why is he still free?  I guess his conscience got the better of him in an instance of sober because he turned himself in. But now the once free-spirited, funny, normal two year old has neurological deficits that he may not ever recover from.  In the fifteen minutes it took me to start his IV, his grandma sobbingly told us his heartbreaking story.  I wish a simple hug would make things better for them.

And that's not the end of his story.  His momma left him in the hospital room for a bit today with her boyfriend (I think he is the child's daddy, too) and when she came back, there was a bright red hand print on the little boy.  What more does this little boy have to go through?  Stress is no excuse for that kind of behavior!  Now on top of the loss of their "normal" little boy, this family has to deal with possible abuse issues too.

People confuse me, but the element of surprise is slowly disappearing.  I can't say it surprises me anymore when I hear such stories and see such behaviors.  The world has gone crazy and gets worse every day.  I'm moving to Mars!

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

to do or not to do...


I am so restless all of a sudden and I can't decide what mood to be in.  I've actually had a pretty productive day today.  I worked for several hours on my photography assignment, and then I cleaned my house.  After which, I attempted to mow my yard, but it turned into a bit of a lawnmower fiasco.  My riding mower is on loan so I try to baby it.  Today after filling it with gas and checking the oil, I started it and pulled it out of the shed...only to find it smoking and stinky.  So I turned it off, made a call to my uncle (it's his mower), and he proceeds to tell me to use it anyway.  Yeah right!  I am pretty competent, but I am not about to use a smoking loud stinky lawnmower that I don't own.  What if I blow up the engine??

Anyway, now I have nothing to do and it's a beautiful day outside.  Guess I could take a walk or go for a run.  I kind of feel like doing nothing but my mind and my body won't let me sit still.  I know where this restlessness is stemming from.  I have a decision to make-something I really want-but I don't know if it's really in my best interest.  Is it going to benefit or harm me in the long run?   It involves others too, so is it going to benefit or harm them?   I've been thinking through the pro's and con's of this decision and it's got me edgy and restless.  I guess, this too shall pass...I just hope when it does, it's because I made the right decision.

Monday, May 24, 2010

Magpie 15-The tragic storm

Alone, afraid, and in awe, she sat by the water's edge.  There really was nowhere else; the water seemed to be everywhere.  It hit hard and fast without warning.  The storm had come and gone and with it went her home, her family.  People were scattered everywhere; some walking aimlessly, others injured and immobile.  Many not alive.  Many looking like dead fish sprawled across the tormented sand.  Her young eyes had never witnessed such devastation.

She was used to living with little means and little food; their home barely with a roof.  But she had been raised with her little sister and baby brother knowing no difference.  Her household was full of love and laughter.  Now tears fell from her face as she realized that was all gone.  She was barely seven and alone.  Gone was her home and her family.

Afraid to move, scared to stay put, she sat there trembling, crying.  Others stepped over and around her, yelling out names she didn't recognize, crying for help.  The chaos made her sink deeper into her mind to a place she could hide away.  The screams, pleas for help, and cries of agony and loss too much for her ears to bare.  And then, a stranger kneeling in front of her speaking softly with comforting words.  The kind stranger-lady took her by the hand, led her to a half fallen hut, and covered her with a woven blanket.  She sat there with about twenty other parent-less children, her mind circling around an unknown future.

I happened across this video today when I couldn't get this song out of my head.  It became the inspiration for this story.  I can't even imagine the fear and pain many children (in our country and the poor countries) suffer with tragedy or even just the rotten cards life deals them.  I wish I could save them all!

*if you want to learn more about magpie tales, click the link next in "Challenges I Love"

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Rainy day...160

The rain has come in abundance!
If I wanted to mow or run or hike,
I don't stand a chance.
But I am flexible with my
Would anyone like to dance?

**what can you say in 160 characters?  Visit Monkey Man from "Blogs I love" to take the challenge!

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Six Word Saturday

~these weeks just keep flying by

~i have unexpected guests this weekend

~A great day for the mountains

Another six word series this week.  Happy Saturday everyone!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Baby World

Today in baby world, we had to defend a little baby along with her momma to the doctors in charge of her care. The way things go, the doctors don't work as closely as the nurse with the little patients and their families.  They don't develop the attachment...their focus is to cure the disease-who cares about the whole person.  It's frustrating at times.  They want their labs and everything to work perfectly, but these are little humans we are dealing with.

This little girl, less than one year old, has been in the hospital almost a week.  She hasn't been eating because she had surgery on her belly and it wasn't quite ready for food.  So, she's been getting nutrition through her iv's; all well and good, except that the poor little girl has terrible veins.  Over the course of the week, between lab draws and IV sticks, she'd probably been stuck over forty times.  The docs just didn't see a problem with that.  They didn't have to listen to the baby cry as she got stuck over and over; they didn't have to see the tears of helplessness and frustration fall from mom's eyes.  Sad!

Today they wanted us to stick her for yet another iv and all her veins were used up.  Mom was fed up and fought for a central line (which is a surgically placed line and longer lasting), and we had to fight and plead our case with the doctors, too.  Finally when her blood sugar dropped too low and we couldn't get an IV, they let us start feeding her.

Mom was a champ in my eyes; she stood up for her little girl and made sure enough was enough.  Those are my kind of parents; she even tried to apologize to us for being so difficult.  We told her to never apologize for standing up for her one year old!  I know doctors have tough decisions to make and a hard job, too.  It would be nice, though, if they argued a little less with us nurses and had more faith in our assessment and judgement skills.  And it would be nice if they would listen to the parents a little more closely because really, who knows the patient better than her own mother?

Monday, May 17, 2010

Magpie 14-The Perfect Plate

She finds herself drawn to the plate
with the perfect crack down the center
as it sits so pristine in the china cabinet;
The memories surround it with a mix
of sweet sorrow and smiles.

Flashbacks to a better time
filled with laughter and fun.
Reminiscing of a love once present
but no longer in her reach.
It speaks sad with an edge of bitter sweetness

she should rid of it, rid herself of this reminder
but one's life is made up of the little memories
of the things that made one laugh, one smile, one cry.
The memories make the loss worth enduring
despite the longing in her heart.

So in the cabinet it shall remain unharmed.
she will embrace the memories it inspires.
More plates she will add to her collection and
one day she will find that perfectly uncracked plate-
probably when she's not looking.

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Surviving and smiling 160

It's a daily battle fighting these demons
I fight their chaos
And even still they cannot keep the smile's grace
from showing it's found its way back to my face.

**What can you say in 160 characters?  Visit Monkey Man from blogs I love to take the challenge!

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Six Word Saturday

-Today is a celebration of friends

-It is my best friends' birthday

-they are twins; double the celebration

-We have big plans for today!

(today, I did a series of six words because I had too much to say!  Happy Saturday.)

Friday, May 14, 2010 pie

Tonite, I've been baking.  In preparation for a birthday celebration for my twin best friends, this is what I have been up to:

Thursday, May 13, 2010

almost perfection

Eating a slice of caramel pecan fudge brownie cheesecake a la mode at the Cheesecake Factory, spending all day shopping for a new summer wardrobe because last year's is too big, being with my very best friends for an entire day...there's not much more that needs to be added to this equation to make one perfect day!

Monday, May 10, 2010

My first Magpie writing

This is my first attempt at a Magpie story.  This one is based on actual events I witnessed.  I really have no idea what was going on in the character's head though, so I'm improvising.  Here goes.

     He sits in the crowded ER patient room; one of 12 other patients.  He's  feeling ignored and irritated, even the police officer sitting right outside his room is paying him no attention.  Five hours has gone by and he has seen a nurse once and has yet to see a doctor.  Just because he came in handcuffs, they think they can ignore him and give him less than thorough treatment.  They'll think twice about that soon enough.  The headache is still there, hasn't eased up at all for three days.  The tylenol they gave him five hours ago hasn't even touched it.  He watches nurse after nurse, doctor after doctor pass by in a hurry with not even a glance towards him, as though the other patients are more important. 
     Finally, a nurse comes in to start an IV.  She attempts in his right arm, but he jerks and yells when the needle enters the skin. The vein turns blue and there is now a bruise left in the needle's place.  She doesn't even offer an apology, just a sarcastic sigh.  She attempts to stick his left arm at the bend of his elbow, this time calling for assistance.  A male nurse enters the room and holds him down.  He feels like a three year old and his agitation is building.  The nurses continue to hold him while they secure the now in place IV.   He's angry and can feel his face redden.  They won't even look him in the eyes or speak to him.  Next, he is carted off to CT scan, the police officer in tow.  The scan is uneventful and he is brought back to his room several minutes later to once again be ignored. 
     After what seems an eternity, a young boy who doesn't look more than 22 comes in and introduces himself as a resident and tells him the CT scan shows nothing and they can find nothing wrong with him.  They will be discharging him back to the jail now.  He can't take it any longer. Six hours in the ER with little attention and absolutely no respect pushes him to his limit. They can't even send in a real doctor; just one in training to tell him he's imagining his pain.  The headache is still present and no less than before.  He can't take the constant throbbing and his thoughts are all jumbled.  He snaps. His right hand flies up to his right eye, his fingers dig in, and within just a few seconds his eye is yanked from the socket and flying towards the resident's back as he is exiting.  It misses and rolls to the floor.  The resident turns around speechless as he sits there grinning from ear to ear.  The pain from his eye has eased the pain from his head. He lays back on the bed satisfied with his actions, chuckling. 
    Finally, he gets the attention he's been waiting six hours for.  Doctors and nurses gather around his room to see his missing eye and the eyeball now sitting in a sterile container floating in sterile water.  He's even going to get a psychiatric evaluation now.  He won't be going back to jail tonite. 

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Mother's Day 160

I've given birth to no one
but maybe someday soon.
Though I love my little nephew
as if he came right from my womb
Happy Mother's Day to all you great mommies

what can you say in 160 characters?  visit Monkey Man from blogs I love to take the challenge.

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Six Word Saturday

Sometimes I get my hopes up...

Don't you hate when you're excited about something and looking forward to it-then when it finally gets here and happens, it turns out to be a disappointment?  I think sometimes I put too much expectation into things and then when they don't turn out, it makes me have an after feeling of "blah."  Maybe if I wouldn't expect so much, my disappointment wouldn't be so great.  Can you really live life like that though...without hope and expectation?

Thursday, May 6, 2010

my baby world...(my job)

Yesterday was another incredibly busy day in baby world.  First I had to assist with an unexpected, emergency c-section of a baby with prenatally diagnosed CCAM (which means they noted a large mass inside the baby's chest-outside of the lungs-on ultrasound).  The thing is that our hospital doesn't deliver this is a big event when it happens.  I work at a large children's hospital that doesn't deliver; yeah it's sounds strange to me too.  Anyway, we have all the staff and equipment to deliver so the baby was in excellent hands, so no worries there.  The little fellow didn't want to do much when he was born; we had to give him a breathing tube.  He was several weeks early and his little lungs just weren't ready to do all the work on their own.  I checked on him today and he is doing great.  He's had his lung medicine, some antibiotics and is on his way to saying goodbye to the tube.   ...and the great news...the baby doesn't have CCAM; he will not be needing surgery!

After all that was finished, we had to go to another hospital and pick up a sweet little babe with a heart defect.  He will be on his way to surgery in the next couple of days.  I've checked on him too and he's just hanging out and chilling with his nurses right now.   My patients made me smile, even though I was working on one hour of sleep yesterday.  Needless to say, I went home last night and fell out (asleep). 

Today, I am busy working on a presentation from a case I did a few months ago.  I have to present it next Tuesday and talking to a group is not my strong suit...this ought to be good.  On top of it all, I have never even put together a power point.  This really ought to be good! 

Well, that's the latest from baby world.  I love my job!

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Change has come

With the rearranging of my thinking and my heart the last couple of months, I decided that it was time to rearrange my blog and it's purpose.  So changes have been made.  My life will continue to change and I plan to embrace it-the highs and the lows-as they come.

I took my first of three swimming lessons today.  I am already a fairly good swimmer, but have decided that I want to be even better.  I've been thinking about doing a small triathlon within the next year so I need to focus on training in all three areas.  When I say small, I mean a 200meter swim, a 9 mile bike ride, and a 5k run.  Guess I should think about getting a bike first, huh?

Sunday, May 2, 2010

busy working 160

Sorry I'm late
but it's been a long four days
been hard at work;
there was no time for play.
but now that I am done
I can just rest
knowing I've helped someone.

**What can you say in 160 characters??  If you're up for the challenge, check out Monkey Man from blogs I love...

Saturday, May 1, 2010

Six word saturday

I will feed my good dog...

Ok, I guess that might need a little explanation.  I was talking with my partner at work today and he told me that he'd recently read a quote that got him thinking.  The quote/short story went something like this.  "I have a good dog and a bad dog.  They like to fight alot.  Which one wins you ask?  Whichever one I feed..."    Well, this made him decide to start reading the bible a little more.  He said he's fed his bad dog enough and it's time to start feeding the good one.  I love good quotes...they really can get you motivated to make change.  I know I definitely try to feed my good dog regularly...and hopefully she's a bit fatter than my bad dog!